Benjamin, Aaronson, Edinger & Patanzo, P.A.

Mayor Gone Wild

Every day that sworn enemy of the gentile upscale East Fort Lauderdale gay community,
Fort Lauderdale Mayor Jim Naugle, travels from his East Fort Lauderdale home past a little
convenience store called Rio Vista located in a small strip shopping center on South Federal
Highway.  One day, this little embarrassing village idiot noticed a little sign at Rio Vista
advertising that they sold X rated DVDs and other adult material.  The lame duck mayor who
cannot run again due to term limits, pops his proverbial cork and the next thing we know a code
inspector from the City of Fort Lauderdale files a half-ass citation against the convenience store
alleging it is an illegal sex shop prohibited by Fort Lauderdale zoning regulations as being too
close to a church!

At this point, the proprietors called Benjamin & Aaronson to look into the matter.  First,
there is nothing in any ordinance of the City of Fort Lauderdale that regulates any business called
a “sex shop”.  Although the Code Enforcement Division of the City of Fort Lauderdale was
alerted that this charge was all screwed up and there wasn’t even a valid allegation of
wrongdoing on paper against Rio Vista, the case languished for months and months until finally
and eventually someone in the city staff heeded the words of their own City Attorney’s Office
and dismissed the citation.  All the while our mayor, the pride of Fort Lauderdale and our
national embarrassment, drove by our little “sex shop” two times a day while traveling to and
from work!

Within a few days a second citation was lodged against the store now alleging that it was
an illegal adult business prohibited by Fort Lauderdale Code.  The problem was that there were a
few adult items which made up a small percentage of the stock-in-trade of the store.  However,
by the very definition contained in the Fort Lauderdale Ordinance itself, did not make it an adult
business nor illegal.  The Rio Vista convenience store was no more an adult store than any 7-11
or other convenience store which had a small rack of adult merchandise amongst their other
wares to be sold.  So the little store compiled a thorough and complete floor plan, area
measurements, break down of inventory by percentages and other statistical data in the form of
an affidavit signed by the corporate President and submitted it to the City, proving the lack of the
requisite amount of material which would even come close to making this store an adult use.

On the day of the hearing before the Special Master, the City urged the suavey old retired
Circuit Judge sitting as the Special Master to look at all the evidence presented and make a
decision and dismiss the charges against the store.  Over and over the old codger questioned the
City Attorney about why the City was going forward by presenting evidence to him when they
put on the record themselves that they were satisfied that the premises did not qualify as an adult
store.  He wanted to know why he was the one who would have to dismiss the charges when the
City was putting on the record the fact that they were satisfied based on the Affidavit as it applied
to the Ordinance that the store was not adult.  Over and over again, the old Judge refused to make
any determination and relentlessly kept putting the decision back on the City.  Eventually, the
City dismissed the case themselves and both sides and the Judge left City Hall to return to their
everyday lives.  That day like every other day, the little mayor in his emperor clothes drove home
past the little sex shop which continues to piss him off to no end.

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